Excerpt from my Book, "A Friendly Guide to Writing and Ghostwriting": The Initial Ghostwrite Meeting
When I have my first meeting with a prospective client, usually a celebrity who wants me to ghostwrite her memoir, it feels like an audition. But while the client is auditioning me, I’m auditioning her. Or him. I often use feminine pronouns when I describe my work, but the information is true for all genders. Some of the criteria I use is the same with everyone:
1. I quiet the butterflies in my stomach.
Meeting with a peer is not that difficult since I have very few preconceptions. Meeting with a celebrity is far more complicated. No matter how many times I face a meeting with the VIP of the moment, I have to get over the mystique that precedes him or her in order to have a fruitful conversation. Rumor may have it that she is a joy to be around or a misery to work with, but I have to evaluate that for myself, rumor being the operative word. I need to appraise her apart from reputations, judgments, and abounding gossip.
I once had a first meeting with a woman who was infamous for having a short temper, but I tried to arrive at her home without any biases. She greeted me graciously and I quickly discovered that she was not a tyrant or a bully. She lived on tight deadlines, she had a huge career and a family to raise and she had no time for people who sucked up and didn't listen or do what she asked. I made sure to complete our work in a timely fashion and act as casually as I could when we were together. We ended up getting on extremely well and I was able to write a bestselling book for her.
I’ve learned a lot about handling famous people, but it isn't easy to act casually when Diana Ross is quietly sings to her little boy: “Stop in the Name of Love.” Or when Magic Johnson strides into a meeting in full basketball gear and offers me his hand which is twice the size of mine. Or when Kenny Loggins plays his latest as yet unpublished tracks for me. A news anchor showed me her in-home newsroom with multiple TV screens covering the walls on every side. An Oscar winning movie star invited me into her massive three room closet, almost as big as a small house, full of Chanel, Armani, and Prada, equipped with a combination lock.
It’s difficult not to become star struck and stupid under the spell of fame and fortune. It’s heady and exciting, but I talk myself down and find an inner calm so the client and I can make a connection. I need her to see me as a peer, not in fame or wealth, but rather in consciousness and presence, so she won't feel she has the right to boss me around. I need to make sure not to become intimidated as I prop her up, encourage her, and show her my self-confidence, never appearing subservient or filled with adoration. If she senses fear or awe in me, she’ll shut down, so I watch for the signs and decide how to best position myself to be seen how I need to be seen.
2. I listen well.
Just like any human being, a prospective client wants to be heard, acknowledged, and understood. She is about to spill her guts to me about personal things so she needs to feel safe. I let her know that my job as a ghostwriter is not to create a vision for her or urge her to expose things that she wants to keep secret. Rather, my job is to listen to her vision and help her express it. My confident and kind attitude needs to assure her that unlike press interviews, magazine articles, or talk shows, she will not be getting ambushed or blindsided. She is often dubious, but when I make it clear that nothing will be published without her seal of approval, she starts to relax.
During that first meeting, I look my client in the eye, and if she does the same with me, that’s a good sign. As the interview progresses, I take note: Does she listen? Does her vision make sense? Does she have one? Is she coherent and direct? Is she forthcoming about her life or will it take urging and cajoling? Can she hold a thought or does she get distracted and ramble on? Will she be willing to take direction? Does she treat me with respect? Does she understand the collaboration process? Does she play well with other children?
The writing process will require her to take criticism and direction, a tough thing for celebrities who are used to calling the shots and surrounding themselves with “Yes” people who bow and scrape for approval. I find these things out as quickly as possible since the meeting is usually an hour or less. All too often, a client doesn't really want to write a book. Rather, she wants to have a book written for her with minimal participation on her part. That isn't a collaboration and it doesn't appeal to me.
2. I ask important questions.
The first and most important question is: Why do you want to write a book?
If the answer is, “I’ve had a full life and I’d like to share what I’ve learned,” or “I want to leave a legacy for my children,” I get a good feeling. If they say, “My agent thinks it’d be good for my career,” or “I want to make a lot of money,” or “I want to get back at my boyfriend,” I go on red alert. Books, especially memoirs, are labors of love and everyone involved has to work hard and keep their eyes on the prize – an authentic and compelling account that will tell the truth. Readers can sense when the celebrity is lying and they don’t like it.
When a client says, “It has to be a best seller, nothing else will do,” that kind of pressure makes me want to cut and run. No matter how good the writing or how famous the celebrity, no one knows what will get under a reader’s skin. No one knows what will resonate with the general public at any given time. You can write your ass off, do tons of research, and interview a client over and over, but there are no guarantees that you’ll have a bestseller on your hands. You have to show up each day, do the work, stay on course and surrender it to the writing gods.
3. Trust the Process.
When you don’t get a particular job, no matter how much you wanted it or how well you think the first meeting went, it might be a blessing in disguise. There are so many reasons why you may not click with someone. Maybe the topic isn't right for you. Maybe the client will be a nightmare to work with. Whatever it is, you have to be aware of how you talk to yourself when you don't get chosen. If you trash yourself for what you call “failing,” you may never get up the gumption to start looking for the next job.